The Pac Man Avenger

The Hike

2006-02-27T13:14:00.000-08:00

One day I and my friend Michael decided to go on a hike in the woods. First we needed supplies so we went to supplies-r-us and got some Coca-cola, pizza, uncooked rice, and two hats to keep the sun off of our heads. We were then ready for our hike.

The hike started out wonderfully, the sun was rising in the east and the meadow before the wood was covered in a fine dew. However, as we began to walk through the meadow we fell through a hole covered with sticks. We fell hard, 10 feet down, which knocked us out for several hours. We awoke with the sun now shining brightly over head to discover we were in the midst of a camp. This was not an ordinary camp of humans; it was populated by intelligent, but ferocious man-eating bears! They had us soaking in a mixture of garlic, onions, and salt and pepper for most of the day. They imagined this would make us nicely flavored for their breakfast in the morning, so we had to wait until night fall to make our escape.

That evening I used my sharp wit and personality to cut my own, and Michael’s restraints. As we were making a break for it, Michael (the self proclaimed genius) accidentally set off the alarm awakening our enemy. As I was running for dear life I had one of my many MacGyver moments. I mixed the uncooked rice and Coca-cola and through it in the midst of the awakening bears camp. The Cola caused the rice to drastically expand at an exponential rate, causing the biggest explosion I have ever witnessed this side of Hiroshima.

Me and Michael survived the horrific blast and after eating our fill of bear stir-fry, decided we needed a well earned vacation!

“So next time your in the woods make sure you don’t forget you rice and coca-cola!”

Too da loo!

The Sandbox

2006-01-31T13:11:00.000-08:00

One day I was playing in my sandbox, and I started to dig a hole. After an hour of digging I found myself to be six feet deeper and standing on what appeared to be a trap door. I forced open the door and I discovered a lost city. I climbed down a ladder and found myself in the middle of the city. I looked around the lost city only to discover that it was a ghost city. I thought to myself…“wow, I have a whole city at my feet.” After a couple of hours wondering around and pondering what to name this place, I finally decided to name it BooVille. Just after giving my new kingdom a name I saw the most amazing article of…BEEP…BEEP…BEEP…BEEP… I woke up suddenly to the sound of my alarm clock, only to discover that it was all a dream.

Don’t you hate dreams like that?

Blue bell the knight

2006-01-30T13:28:00.000-08:00

Once upon a time there lived a knight named Blue Bell. He wasn’t the tallest, brightest, or the strongest of knights, but he WAS gorgeous!
One summer day Queen RedNose and all of the tallest, brightest, and strongest knights got kidnapped by the terrible Knights of the Wholly Cheese. So King RedNose tried to call any remaining knights he could think of, but to no avail. So because he had no other choice the King requested the assistance of the gorgeous but other wise pathetic Blue Bell.
He was in fact the only knight left on the known world. So Sir Blue Bell began his long and arduous quest to rescue the Queen and her knights (so in other words they’re all doomed). So after two and half years of fighting his way through a thick and thin variety of dairy assortments, Blue Bell finally reached the castle of the Wholly Cheese. Before he assailed the castle walls he decided to have a smoke (Gouda that is). He lit up his cigarette and threw the match over his shoulder. It soared up into the armory’s window and onto a keg of gunpowder. KABLAM!!!!! The castle of wholly Cheese was in shreds. He sorted through the rubble and found Queen RedNose. The Queen said to him“About time you got here. What took you so long?........Blah……Blah…..Blah” as the queen continued to scream at the now heroic knight, He said, “Forget this!” and ran away leaving the queen in the dust. When he got back home he quit being a knight, because it wasn’t worth all the trouble, and besides he was to gorgeous to risk his beauty in such a life of danger and dairy!

The Mice

2006-01-26T12:51:00.000-08:00

People think mice are brainless creatures, but it is not true. One day mice will rule the world. As they have mastered the power of mind control. With this ability that they have developed over the past fifty years they WILL control our minds! They will make us be their slaves and make us create for them a glorious mouse civilization. The most horrible truth, however, is found in the end... when they turn humanity against itself, finally using their terrible powers of mind control to make us turn on one another, eliminating us from the earth. So to prevent this terrifying tragedy my secret organization has devised the super cat. The super cat has a new stealth technology, super cat strength, and can detect a mouse up to fifty miles away. If you can't afford one... don't worry, you can do your part just by setting mouse traps in your house.

Humanity depends on it!

Long live all rodent haters!

Deadly Animals

2006-01-24T12:59:00.000-08:00

Most people think lions, tigers, and bears(oh my!) are the most deadly animals, but this is not true. The most deadly of all animals is in fact THE SQUIRL! Squirls are just plain evil! They steal golf balls, kill baby birds, and throw their nuts at you. So next time you see a squirl, get a rocket propelled grenade launcher and blow it to kingdom come! Just kidding cause you might kill a tree.

If you are ever board one day... get some hot sauce, put it on a peanut and leave it out for a squirl. Then watch it's little face as it eats the peanut as the results could be hilarious!

So long fellow squirl haters!

Space!

2006-01-23T12:48:00.000-08:00

Space... it is dark and cold. If you get lost who are you going to ask for directions? Not the mars alians, because they are red in the face (Hahahaha) and it is so hard to find a good mars bar on mars.

Do you think if you take your helmet off in space that your head would explode? If it did it would blow your mind! (Hahahaha)

So long fellow space lovers!

Apple trees

2006-01-23T12:31:00.000-08:00

What's worse than eating an apple and finding a worm?

Finding half a worm HAHAHAHAHA!